I need some advice!

[slosprint]

So basically there is this crazy old lady who lives down the street, and every day she comes into our yard and lurks around our neighbors AC unit. This was all well and good until I went into our yard today to find that our garden hose was broken and spraying full blast everywhere and that all of the tomatoes in our garden, even the ones that weren't red yet, were completely gone. I have no clue what to do in this situation and if anyone has any advice it would be greatly appreciated.

Buy a gun?

Get a no trespassing sign then buy a gun

[slosprint]

Perhaps I should switch the cherry tomatoes with cherry hot peppers and see how she likes those... They look pretty much the same.

Call the Popo.

Put a atomic bomb under the tomatos and when she pick them, it goes off and blows her up.

cool5, somethings wrong with that statement and I'm gonna let you figure it out. ;)

[slosprint]

Originally posted by cool5

Put a atomic bomb under the tomatos and when she pick them, it goes off and blows her up.

I don't want to be in the house right next to the atomic blast, thank you.

Send her a letter filled with the T Virus and watch her become a zombie and eat people. After you've had your fun, give her the antidote and torture her to death.

Egg her house.

[Oscar]

Buy a gun, buy a no tresspassing sign. Shoot her and then run and nail the
no tresspassing sign to your house.

Just kidding. I would seriously consider acting crazy too and chasing her down the street and poking her with a stick if she didn't react to you jumping all around her.

get a tazer or some peper spray, i would rather be shot, stabed hung and castrated befor having peper spreay in my face again

[slosprint]

you got maced? Why?

Let's just say gazag is not allowed within 100 feet of playgrounds.

Load the plants with 100 mini pistols and when she goes near the plant they all go off.

[slosprint]

Hire cool5 to stand out in your backyard. That will scare her away.

Load her house attic with balistic missles, aomib bombs, barrels of gunpowder, rockets, Nitroglisrin, dynamight and long range missles. When the attic gets too hot bcause the fan is broke, all the bombs, missles and gunpowder go off at once.

I like jcoasters' idea. But if all else fails, surely you live in a place where police exist? Why the hell haven't you called them yet?!

mabye a silly question but it hasent been asked yet

WHY do you think shes doing this? have you pissed her off in any way? got a grudge with her? anything like that

Oh I don't know, you could try talking to her.

[Dirk_Ermen]

Put a beartrap near the entrance. That'll teach her...

Do this to her...



That is all.

After all this I'm surprised no one has suggested claymores and bouncing betties. But yeah, cool5's got some great suggestions with that atomic bomb lol.

Of course, since you're probably not willing to declare war quite yet (not to mention have to deal with the police), I would personally setup a security camera around the area. The no-trespassing signs are a good idea too and/or you could improvise a simple trip wire alarm system. (If you can build good coasters, I'm sure you could come up with something there.)

The garden hose can be used to soak anyone who goes in, if threatening them with a gun isn't your thing. Otherwise, you probably need to keep the valve shut off to prevent a bad water bill. If she's just an old lady you probably don't need a firearm anyway. (Though if there's a lot of those odd sort of people where you live, a gun is probably safer.)

[slosprint]

Originally posted by boneplaya

I like jcoasters' idea. But if all else fails, surely you live in a place where police exist? Why the hell haven't you called them yet?!

Well I didn't actually see her committing the act of stealing my tomatoes and breaking my garden hose, all I know is that I saw her touching our neighbor's AC unit lustfully and then leave, and when I went out the hose was broken and the tomatoes were gone... I am 90% sure that it was her, but I don't really have any evidence.